Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize