College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize