im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
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Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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