so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
