i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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