drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Your cock deserves a montage
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
