I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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