U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
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it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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