im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
