Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
