Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
