He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
No more Irish car bombs ever.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
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Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
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Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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