I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize