She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize