I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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