This is not my ceiling
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You ruined the universe
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize