Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
