Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm like, not good at living.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
