we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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