So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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