he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
This is my gift to your gina
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize