Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
