You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
