I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
