They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize