How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He passed out mid-signature
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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