i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
