I'm so fucking centered right now
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
