Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
