Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize