My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
