I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
