Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
fuck your aforementioned shoe
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
