He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize