Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
