But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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