Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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