my mouth tastes like poor choices
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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