He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
As shirtless as possible
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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