I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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