areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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