what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
