she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I need to calm my uterus...
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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