apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I need a burrito and a hug.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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