Im at strip club and am horny
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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