Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
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