you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize