it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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