Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
