Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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